a conversation

I went to pick Eleanor up from Cubbbies a couple of Sunday nights ago. She usually bounces out with a big smile and lots to tell me, but this time she was standing against a wall with a quivering lower lip. In the hall I asked her if something was wrong. Holding my hand, "I'll tell you when we get home, Mommy. I don't want the other kids to hear me." My heart went out to her! I had never heard say something that would indicate self-consciousness in that way. I took her down the back stairs and asked if she wanted to tell me, since no one else was there. She looked at me with big eyes and in a trembling voice said, "Mommy, is it true? Is it true that wicked men put Jesus on the cross and killed Him?? Did that really happen?" My eyes filled up with tears! That was the last thing I had expected her to say right then. I realized that although I talk almost every day about "Jesus dying to save us," I have never talked about Him being KILLED. "Yes, Eleanor, that is true" I told her, and she began to cry, like a friend had died. She asked, "Is that going to happen to me?" I told her that she would not be killed on a cross, but that her body would die someday, because everyone dies someday. And most likely that it would not be until she was very old, but that we never know when we will leave this earth - only the Lord knows. And I reminded her as we have talked about before, that those who trust in Jesus Christ to save them from their sinfulness will spend eternity in Heaven with Jesus. "I don't want to die and go to Heaven, I want to stay here and live in my home forever!" *sigh* Sometimes I feel like that, too, I told her. But we have to trust what God says, that Heaven is so much more wonderful than anything we can even imagine here. No more sin, no more hurting, no more sadness or tears! Being with Jesus! I told her, "Eleanor, Jesus died for your sins so that you would not have to. " "But Mommy, He didn't do anything wrong!!" That's right, He didn't, but you did! I did! We talked about one of her Awana verses, "While we were sinners, Christ died for us." And I reminded her that Jesus didn't stay dead! He rose up from the grave! He is alive now! Then we were back in the church gym, surrounded by people, walking out to the van to sobbing, tired brothers. It was a conversation I'll always remember! I was so touched, and reminded in a precious way of the sadness and enormity of our sins, of Christ's death in our place. I was reminded to pray earnestly for tender hearts for all my children, for the seeds of the gospel to find fertile soil in them. I am so thankful for the tender heart of Eleanor!